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To Do Or Not To Do

December 09, 2016

 I once had someone tell me that in real relationships, in real lasting relationships, you don't celebrate the smaller anniversaries. The woman who told me this was engaged to be married in a few short months and now has been married for over a year. I always wondered what she meant by that until I saw one of my old friends post their six month anniversary photos on Facebook. She said they never celebrated the first month or really the ones after that because they both couldn't remember when they had become official. They felt like it had been much longer than six months so they couldn't remember the specific day but realized that a week ago, it would have been six months (they think).
 I realized what the now married woman said to me once I realized that after only a week of being with my SO, it felt like a month. But it was seriously only about ten days. Even though we don't live in the same city or go to the same school we've been lucky enough to see each other seven out of those ten days even if only for a couple hours. Obviously thats because of the holidays being present, but still we've been pretty lucky. It's nothing, distance wise, like Arden and Will (insert coos of couple goals) where one lives in London, England and the other in Santa Barbra, California. Considering I still don't have my license yet, yes I know I need to get it, but we've been able to figure things out. And he'll be home for the holidays which will be closer to me for sure.
 But back to the first sentence I wrote. I understand it now, or at least I think I do. Now I won't say what I think the meaning of it means, I'll let you interrupt it for yourself. And even though this is my first real adult relationship, I'll explain more on why another time, I understand it.
And though I'm excited to think about celebrating our one month anniversary (at the time I'm writing this we've only been together for three weeks) I feel like at the same time I don't want to. Yes it's a nice little milestone and cute to think about, but I'd rather have the feeling of "oh wow it's only been a month?" while we look back at the day rather than "we've made it a month!"
 I'd rather be so caught up in the moment and having fun with life with my SO and miss our first month or third month anniversary than have the mind set where we mark it as a huge accomplishment in our relationship when we have really great ones in the future. That sentence may sound negative or something along the lines of that but it makes sense to me. If my SO wants to celebrate our first month anniversary, in no way will I shut that idea down. I will celebrate the crap out of it and go all out if that's what they want to do. But for one month, I'd rather go see a movie at home or in theaters and hangout rather than have a huge fancy dinner and give gifts, because how will you top that on the six month anniversary?
Anyways, you do you boo boo! If you want to celebrate the first month, or Hell the first week, then go for it! Throw flowers at them and shower them with chocolates, do your thing. As Arden Rose says: "If that's something that's precious to you and important to you, good on you." So go shower your SO with gifts or just your time, your choice, your relationship.
 Oh and by the way, if you haven't already picked up on it, update on dating: I'm no longer single.

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