The Men I Adore

by - December 08, 2017

 Do you ever wish you could just stitch together the perfect man (or woman) based off of all your celebrity crushes, fictional characters you adore, and random strangers you romanticized after leaving them behind you in line at the coffee shop? Me too, because all my crushes on the men in rom coms and the musicians I fawn over are seemingly perfect. I would love to find a guy who is all parts of the parts of them I love and just date the heck out of him and marry him when I'm 25 (even writing that makes me want to push it to 27 or 30). But unless I could pull a Weird Science and just make the perfect man, I'm left to find one who has at least a few of the characteristics I adore.
 I write this because I've been thinking about it lately. The men I date, the type of guy I like but shouldn't date, the type of guy who I didn't think was my type but made my happy, the characteristics I adore, the high standards I should have. I don't revolve my life around dating, no one should, but I do date- I am dating, and I always end up finding good people after I swear it off. But now I'm looking more into who I want to spend my time with, who I want to date. I look back at the two men I've been in relationships with and though neither were my type, one of them made me extremely happy. So, what does that mean? I have no idea. But now I'm trying to pinpoint what it is I want in someone. What intrigues me, what compliments my own personalty, what meshes well with my own vibe. So I've looked to all the celebrity crushes I've ever had. From Jesse McCartney when I was like 8 years old to Charlie Puth in the present time. Besides those handsome looks, all an added bonus, what about them makes me 'fangirl' over them? For one, I've found that I'm drawn to musicians. I don't know whether to blame my daddy issues on that one or if I'm just a sucker for a man with a guitar and good voice. My friend says it's because "it shows creativity and potential"which I totally agree with. But then why do I still harbor a total crush for Dean Forrester? The (almost) perfectly written first boyfriend for miss Rory Gilmore? Or Shawn Hunter and his low-key bad boy persona? And Cameron from 10 Things I Hate About You- that dorky cuteness and his big crushing. Why do I think of those guys when I think of what kind of dream boy I would put together? (Just realized it may be a thing for those 90's men with the middle parts...)



 If I could go to a Build-A-Bear for men I know exactly what I would put together. John Mayer's thinking- when you read interviews about him, it just hits me. His latest album hit me hard, so emotionally hard. The way he talks about his music, and the lyrics with the sounds as well in his music strike me. So if I could take that thing that makes John Mayer the way he is, that mindset he has where he's a little egotistical but not too much and he really talks about things in this great sort of way- that's what I would take. Dean Forrester, I'd take his fondness for the one he loves. And I know- I know- Dean is a stage five clinger and in the end it's better Rory and him separated. But he was so fond of Rory, he truly loved her even though realistically it just didn't work. He did anything for her, he understood her and her family, he made her better for who she is, and he did so much for her as her first boyfriend. So I would take his fondness. Shawn Mendes has this maturity and understanding about him that attracts me to him. He's nineteen but he acts older than me, he acts even older than I act and at almost 21 I'm mature for my age when you really get to know my mindset. The way he speaks of love, heartbreak, growing up, understandings, and more. I would totally take his understanding for things. It seems like he's never known a significantly dark trauma that has made him wise, so I want to know how he's become like that.
 There are so many other crushes I've had and have been trying to dissect and analyze as to why that person or character attracts me. I've had answers that are along the lines of overall persona to one specific action or characteristic that draws me. With college being a large dating pool, I can expect to find someone who has at least a handful of those things that fit them- added bonus if they're cute and not from Ohio so I can show them around Cincinnati. Literally my dream dates all consist of taking them around Cincinnati on the street car and showing them all the cool places they've never been to.
 For now though I'll keep adding to my dream boy list and trying to find my McDreamy with the cute grin and good hair. Maybe I'll find him when I move to my new apartment next year, I heard the building is swarming with medical students... I say as I literally just get a text from a medical student going after his next degree.

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